I shall pass this way but once…

” I shall pass this way but once;
any good therefore that I can do,
or any kindness that I can show
- let me not defer nor neglect it,
for I shall not pass this way again. ”

Where I originally found this
quote I do not know, but when
I found it was nearly 16 years ago.
I wrote it out and made several copies.
I put one on my desk, another inside my planner,
one in my wallet, and taped another to the dash of my car.

While going through some boxes after my last move,
I found the copy I had on my desk and I came face to face
with the realization that I was doing very little in my Life
that would indicate that quote meant anything at all to me.

The 2 lines that grab me the most are the 1st and last.
To me it means I am here now – right now
and this is it – there is no 2nd chance.
The middle describes purpose – my purpose.
Over the years I have subscribed more and more
to the theory that we are here merely to live our lives
and do what makes us happy…
US. Me. I.
It explains why I’ve felt so empty & unfulfilled.
For those who know me – really know me;
I am happiest when I am helping others.
When I am making a difference
- causing a positive impact in the life of another; I am alive.

So here I am, writing to you… and writing to me.
What can I do right now – what can I say now
that will leave us both glad we shared this moment ?
Oh, but if I could read your mind at this moment…
Will you dare write me and tell me your thoughts ?
I’ll share mine if you share yours ;)
You know, I’m reminded of a piece of a poem I wrote:

To risk, to dare – to take a leap
we struggle with trembling fear
for those precious words still left unspoken
are the ones we long to hear.

The precious words I spoke of here were “I love you”.

” I shall pass this way but once;
any good therefore that I can do,
or any kindness that I can show
- let me not defer nor neglect it,
for I shall not pass this way again. ”

There are those things that we hide from even ourselves;
secrets so deep that we remain blind to them.
Could it be that the reason I refuse
to stop writing this is because I.. love you ?
Is this the force that has finally pushed it’s way
to the surface tonight – past the denial,
past the fear, past the rationale & logic… -

” I shall pass this way but once; “

I will tell you this now no matter how foolish it may seem -

” any good therefore that I can do,
or any kindness that I can show
- let me not defer nor neglect it, “

You are loved.
By me, by those you know do – and many more you don’t. -

” for I shall not pass this way again. “

You and I will soon part ways.
What I will leave you with is my secret.
I am afraid you will not return the love I have for you,
and therefore I hide it from you – and never tell you.
From time to time I let it out in little pieces;
a kind word, a good deed, a helping hand…
Then I disappear.
So many things are hidden so deeply…
I wonder if I am so different than
who you are beneath the shadow…

” I shall pass this way but once;
any good therefore that I can do,
or any kindness that I can show
- let me not defer nor neglect it,
for I shall not pass this way again. “


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15 Comments

  • By Shelly Aston, October 28, 2010 @ 12:50 am

    my 2 beautiful little girls shianna 6 & shayla 4 were struck by a car on 5-7-09. shayla passed away on 5-8-09 & became an organ donor to help others. shianna passed on 7-8-09 at hospice in my arms after enduring brain surgery. they were …my only children. my mom passed away on 5-2-09 after a 6 month long illness where she suffered terribly, 5 days b4 the horrible tragedy. i do not have a spouse, i leaned on my mom for everything. now in my little girls memory because they are not going in vain, im giving back to those that helped me when i needed it most. i have already done a memorial brick in their honor at the angels of hope memorial garden at pinhook park in south bend. im working with IN state rep jackie walorski to get the loopholes out of the laws as we received no justice, just disgust. im also working with the mishawaka parks dept to have a memorial bench and 2 trees planted and a swingset erected in shianna & shayla’s honor. im working with reg wagle from memorial health foundation to do creative carts in the new children’s hospital in south bend. for all the little girls in our old neighborhood that befriended and loved my children, im going to sponsor them so that they may attend the salvation army little pine camp in michigan this summer. im also going to give back to st. paul’s episcopal church and the good reverend susan haynes. i had no affiliation with this church but they did the memorials of both my girls and paid for their cremations. mommy loves you always & forever, RIP BABY GIRLS

  • By admin, November 4, 2010 @ 8:01 pm

    Can you tell me what you mean by “won’t show properly” ???
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Go after what you want in Life - Don't let it pass you by. Never give up and be caught in strife; You can do anything if you try... ~Rob

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