Keeping the Treasure of You…

Recently I’ve had a few discussion about…
EX’es
(or is it “exes”, “ex’s”, or “exi”
as in more than one “ex” ???)

So here’s my theory.

People are people,
and we all have things about us
that rub people the right way,
and rub them the wrong way.

Of the billions of people in this world,
we have the opportunity to actually meet
with but a mere fraction of them.

Within that group we will find some that we
are attracted to or interested in on some level.

I am not even talking about boy/girl | man/woman attraction;
but simply people having traits, attributes & characteristics that we like.

I’ve always had and held the notion of that
being sort of the doorway to friendship.

So, we get to know these people – each of us
sharing with the other and becoming more
and more familiar with each other.

In this process, we either grow closer and more connected,
or those things about them (or us) that are disliked outweigh
the positive attributes that caught our attention
in the first place and we drift away.

Either way, we’ve had the chance to become part of
another’s world, and for them to have shared in ours.
Either way a blessing !
After all, isn’t one the basest cravings of human nature
the desire for attention & affection ?

Now we get to the sticky part.

Where Man and Woman are concerned,
this friendship process can and very often leads to
a relationship that includes intimacy and romance.

FANTASTIC !
Do you realize how precious few of these experiences
we will have in our lifetime ?!?!?
I have never felt as alive, appreciated or loved
as when in a romantic relationship.

And still, because a friendship becomes
romantic and intimate does not mean that there won’t be
those things that we dislike about the other.

They just have a tendency to be overshadowed
or hidden by the feelings that we enjoy far more
that involve passion, romance, and intimacy.

Yet those little things that bother us we come to realize
are but the tips of icebergs, and eventually we see that
the level of long term compatibility cannot continue.

STOP !

This is the part that I have a hard time with.

(By the way, in layman’s terms the above should read:
“I don’t think this is working out” followed by
some form of packing up and out)

Most of the time people will take this incredible person,
cast them aside and want nothing further to do with them.

Hello?!?
What about all of the things about them
that drew us to them in the first place ?
Unless they were just a fake & lying schmuch,
those things are still there – a part of that person !

So, here we meet someone who we like and they
have enough positive things about them for us to continue
giving and sharing ourselves to the highest levels

and just like that we erase it all ???

They are still a PERSON.

And simply because a few aspects of the relationship
didn’t “work out” – why throw away the whole treasure ?

If I dug up a treasure chest on the beach,
and it was filled with gold, rubies, emeralds
and five silver bars – am I going to bury it
just because I don’t care for silver bars ?

Of course not !
Those silver bars do not make the treasure
any less priceless; and for another
may well be of greater value than the gold…

If someone could treat me so casually
and not appreciate the value of who I am as a person
- regardless of the “status” of the relationship,
then I fear I have made a grave error in choosing them
as someone I could be a friend with in the first place.

No… I can’t even say that;
for just because they choose to throw away treasure
does not mean that I have to lose the treasure of who they are.

All in all it just saddens me that so many lives
are allowed to casually slip from our Life
when there is still so much that is good we can share…

So this may sound an odd thing to say,
but if I ever share my Life with you in any way
it means that you are a treasure to me
no matter what “level” or “status”.

* THIS is for the women
who want to understand men

and for both:  “The Magic of Making Up“