You should enhance WHAT?!?!?!?

Some time ago, when I was reading a fortune a day
from a large bag of fortune cookies, I found
this little gem inside my crispy treat.

” You should enhance your
feminine side at this time. “

I know.
I KNOW !!!
I don’t know whether to laugh or cry about this.
I should cry, because wouldn’t that
be a great way to get in touch with
and enhance my “feminine side” ?!???

Seriously, who went on break at the factory
that makes these fortune cookies ?!???

OK.
So, now that I’ve allowed myself to think that
enhancing my feminine side is a bad thing;
I wonder in what other areas of my Life do I
perceive things said as being negative.

For example, I see women as a whole to be
a far more social creature; talkative and outgoing.
I’ve wanted to be more of THAT my entire Life !!!

But instead, I had visions of needing to trim my nails,
pay more attention to my hair, wear sweeter cologne,
and maybe even buy, oh, a dozen pair of shoes !

You can imagine my relief;
though I may buy a pair of shoes in the next month.
(No heels – I promise !)

But you know, really – how often when people
say something to us do we immediately focus on the
“what’s wrong” of it rather than the “what’s right” ?
Instead of taking things at face value and as an
opportunity to have a positive experience and outcome;
all too often we go to the defensive, get our blaming
finger out and begin pointing fingers with one hand
and building walls around ourselves with the other.

One of my favorite things to say when I hear the
negative reaction of another at something that
either myself or another may have said is;

” Is THAT how you took that ? “

Of course, it’s far easier to do and say for others
because being on the outside looking in you can
more objectively see the “what was said” and
then see what the other person made it mean.
Very often there is a HUGE difference between
the intent of a message and the interpretation.

For example, you’re going to go to dinner with your
significant other, and you see what they’re wearing.
What you say is;
“Are you going to wear THAT tonight?”
(prepare yourself for a myriad of responses like the following)

“What do you mean? Don’t you like it??
What’s wrong with it ?!??
Does it make me look fat?!?!?
Why don’t you ever like the way I look??
I can never make you happy can I ???
You don’t even want to be seen with me,
and you just don’t love me anymore – admit it…
You go out – I don’t want to go anymore.
Maybe you’ll find someone cuter out there who DOES look good.
You’re such a jerk. Don’t even come back.
I hate you… ”

And the response to all of this is:

“It’s supposed to really cool off tonight,
and I was worried you might get cold.”

Interpretation.
Intent.
So let’s do this.
I’m not going to paint my nails any time soon,
but I am going to be even more aware and open
to what others say to me.
And instead of jumping to conclusions,
I think I may start asking a few questions.
I think the best one would be;
“How did you mean that”
and perhaps even
“Why do you ask ?”

Heck, maybe you should try that today, too -
I think you may be very very surprised at
some of the responses you’ll get.

And if you REALLY want to have fun with this -
pretend as if the person who said it to you
actually cared about you, liked you,
and wanted what’s best for you.

And if some of you really really like challenges;
try “hearing” everything that is said to you
as something that could make your Life
even greater than it is now,
and be grateful it was said.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to do something manly,
like work on the car or drink the rest of the beer that’s
been sitting in a glass for two days in the refrigerator.
Heck – maybe I’ll drink the beer AND work on the car.

Because after that,
I might just buy shoes…

:)p

~Rob

ps:  There’s really no beer in the fridge,
but I do have a bottle of raspberry sake on top of the fridge,
next to it a bottle of Chateau SteMichelle Gewurztraminer,
alongside the  Columbia Valley Whistle Stop Red
Cabernet Merlot from Columbia Valley.
Why? Because I’m waiting for a Special Occasion…

All this talk of cookies & wine
is making me hungry for DESSERT!!!